Surviving Unemployment

I still remember it like it was yesterday.  The day my manager, whom I had served for a about one week (since we restructure so often), came to my desk and asked me to meet with him in his office.  As I entered the room, I saw the HR manager.  I immediately knew what was going to happen.  They talked with me for a while but I’m not sure I heard anything.  My heart was pounding so hard and my mind was racing wildly.  What was I going to do now?  My paycheck was the only one I have to support my family.  I took my letter from the company and headed home.

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This all took place at the beginning of the economic downturn.  The housing market was declining and unemployment was climbing.  It was the perfect storm.  Focusing on being positive, I began to prepare my plan for getting that next gig.  As I put everything together, I felt more positive about myself.  I was focused and determined. 

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But alas, two months later, discouragement set in.  So, I reached out to my close friends for support.  I didn’t ask them for a job at their company.  I just wanted encouragement.  They often reminded me that I didn’t appear to be extremely happy in the job anyhow.  Maybe this was the only way to get out of a bad situation.  If I had been released, I may have stayed in it and eventually affected my personal life.  After a few sessions with my friends, I came up with a new plan and was running again.   

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Entering month five, I started to feel hopeless.  I didn’t think I would ever find a job.  Feelings of anger would fill my head as I reflected on the events that put me in this whole situation.  I did what they asked me to do and look what they gave me in return.  If this is the way organizations worked, I didn’t want to be a part of it anymore.  Essentially, they have free reign and can do whatever they want.  Me, I had to have the job, so I guess I had to take it.  This is what I fought for some time.  It was destructive thought and I had to get rid of it.

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I got over it by changing my focus again.  I created a list of things I wanted to do that couldn’t be accomplished while I was working.  One thing that I did was to join a gym, talk with a trainer and put myself on a rigorous exercise program.  This kept the stress down, allowed me to make new friends and connections and most importantly, got me out of the house.  Getting my mind off of the situation was the only way to save my sanity.

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It took over nine months for my story to end.  I was exhausted.  My emotions kept me on a roller coaster ride.  However, changing my focus kept me from dwelling on the negative.  Here are a few things I found that were extremely beneficial in maintaining a positive attitude during such troubling times.

Create a job search plan.  Initially, the novelty in searching for work will be stimulating.  You’ll be hopeful that people who will be reviewing your credentials will be impressed and will want to talk with you.  You’ll also be learning a lot about others and what they do.  Most importantly, you’ll be figuring out how you could fit into their business.  Enjoy this.  The better you get at it, the more successful your search will be. 

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Note:  You’ll need to change your plan from time to time.  Maybe you try searching online for two weeks.  Then, you work with recruiters or local government services.  Other sources could be job groups, career fairs or even a career coach.  Some people may tell you to try everything at once but that could get daunting.  Change things up by focusing on one method at a time.....

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Create a support network.  Unemployment is a tough ordeal that strains your emotions, self esteem and self image.  Use your friends to support and motivate you.  Let them know that’s what you need.  Arrange special meetings that pick you up.  Consider sporting activities, dinner, hanging out at a club or a movie.  These are the times where you can get ideas on what to do while enjoying the camaraderie of your friends. 

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Note:  Get your friends to include you in their network.  Meet their friends and go to their events.  You never know when the next person you meet may be your next employer.....

Build your dream list.  This is the list of things you’ve always wanted to do but never had time for.  A job often takes up most of our time.  Now you have some.  Don’t focus all day of every day on getting the job.  Spend some time in the morning sending out resumes and making contacts.  Then, do one of the items on your dream list.  I went to the gym to exercise every day.  It was my stress relief.  Don’t let unemployment totally rearrange your life. Have a little fun too.

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Maintain a positive attitude.  This is critical.  A bad attitude will spill over into everything you do, especially an interview.  While your support network may support this, you’ll need more than one source if unemployment is prolonged.  Go to the library and check out some audio books by great motivational speakers.  Carry this with you everywhere (in the car, on your IPOD, etc).  I would listen to Anthony Robbins and Les Brown.  Find your favorites and dive in. 

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Note:  The lessons you learn from these experts are great for stories in the interview.  Questions like “how do you motivate others?” become extremely easy to answer.  ....

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Build new skills.  I’m not talking about going to a college to get a degree or certification, although, it’s not a bad idea, if you can.  While you are at the library getting your motivational fix, pick up a few books on something you’d like to learn about.  I chose team-building. I must have read and listened to 100 books on it.  I made myself an expert on it by learning what all the others experts thought, then adding my own experience and thoughts.  You can imagine how I could dazzle interviewers on team related questions.....

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Forget the past.  If you had a bad experience that left you unemployed, learn from it and forget it.  Put enough thought into to understand what went wrong and what you could have done to improve the situation.  Companies are made of people and people make mistakes.  Come to grips with this understanding quickly.  No matter what happened, you are where you are.  End of story.  Focus on building yourself a better place to be.

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Note:  I learned to get over my situation by helping others who experienced something similar.  Give. Give. Give.  You’ll feel much better about the past if you help others avoid similar situations.....

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The bumps in the road of our lives are great for putting things into perspective.  Treat them as learning experiences and opportunities for making your life better.  After all, when we are working, we have little time to change things, even those we know we should.  This is your time to get things back on track.